THE TOON 1 THE BOURNEMOOOTH CHERRY PICKERS 4 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

Posted 'high noon bells' Sunday 19th January 2025

"BACK TO ORTH WITH A VERY LOUD BANG!"

We knew this game wouldnt be eazy against an in form Bournemoooth side, unbeaten in 10 games---but even we couldnt have invisaged a 4-1 defeat after WOR run of 9 succesive wins!

From the word 'go' wor visitors went for the jugular az they kicked towards the Gallowgate End and within 4 minutes they came very close to scorin when Semenyo hit a shot which just went ower the bar!

2 minutes later and they were 1-0 when Semenyo set up Justin Kluivert to fire home! (The son of Patrick)

NUFC were at sixes and sevens az wor oot of form team kept losin possesion and passin to the opposition!?

Bruno then levelled things in the 25th minute at The Leazes End, when Lewis Hall's corner kick foond Bruno's heed and their keeper woz unable to stop the baall from crossin the goal line-- BUT! he then lost possesion near the half way line just before the break and Kluivert raced through unmarked to plant the baall past Dubravka in The Toon goal to give them the advantage at half time!

Bournemoooth got a 3rd on the hour mark, through Outtara, but it woz ruled oot after a lang VAR check az the baall had went oot of play just before the goal!

Anthony Gordon then had a rocket shot blocked at The Gallowgate End, but thats az good az it got from us!

And 'The Cherry Pickers' wornt finished az we huffed and puffed, unable to contain them and their 3rd (indisputable) goal eventually came in stoppage time through Kluivert again, to complete hiz hat-trick (just like hiz daddy had done to us many moons ago!)---and then very deep into stoppage time they rubbed salt into wor wounds with a 4th goal through Kirkez who fired home a tremendous shot to the delight of the 1,700 Cherry Pickers fans high up in The Leazes End! (We were told that they would anly have 300 followers coz of the graveyard kick off time, but in fact they had 400 more fans than Wolves had brought in mid-week!)

By this time half the crowd had departed, with thoosands of empty seats by the time the ref blew for full time!

The 'Cherries' (their nickname) had definatly 'picked' us off!!!

The record 10 wins in a row woz not to be and we must now lick wor wounds for the trip to Sooothampton next Saturday!---An eazy 3 points against the rock bottom club with just 1 win and 6 points aall season?----Yi never naaa with wor lot??? 

Attendance: 52,227. Add on the 51,975 v Wolves and 52088 v Bromley meeenz that a total of 156,290 have passed through the SJP tornstiles in the last 6 days! Unbeleeevable support!

*GUESS WHICH TEAM HE SUPPORTS?👇

 

THE TOON V THE CHERRY PICKERS *** TOMORROW DINNAATIME!

 Posted 'high noon bells'🕭 Friday 17th January 2025

THE LEAZES END BOOZER (aka COMPANIONS CLUB) ON LEAZES PARK ROAD IZ OPEN AT ‘9:30 🛎️S’ IN THE MORNIN’          🤪👍🏁🍺

The Toon gan into this game at SJP lookin to break the club record of winnin 10 consecutive games in Leegue and Cups, while The Cherry Pickers of Bournemoooth (Their nickname's 'The Cherries'--get it?) are lookin to stay undefeated for the 11th time in a row!

So if anybody thought that it would be an eazy game against 'little Bournemoooth' then Fink again!

We are at (near) full strengh for this game again (apart from 'Fab' Schar and 'The Pope') and a win would propel us up to 3rd place in the Premyaa Leegue table, for the time bein' at least and within 6 points of The Liverbirds at the top of the tree---although they will have 2 games in hand az they play after us! (Az dee the rest of the chasin pack!)

Lets 'gan for it' and hope that we can dee it and that 'Alexander the Great' (Isak) can score in hiz 9th sucessive game to extent hiz club record of 8, which he achieved on Wedinzday v Wolves!

We hear that 'The Cherry Pickers' will have a very smaall followin coz of the 'graveyard' '12:30 bells'🕭kick off slot for live telly! (just 300 we hear, will make the 750 mile roond trip, leavin at midneet, we beleeeve!) (The curse of live TV!)

To compensate for the ridiculous KO time, many bars and clubs will oen orlier before the match and 'The Leazes End' (stroke) 'Companions Club' which iz within 'hocklin distance' of The East Stand, will open at '9:30 🕭bells' in the mornin'! (For 'Dry January' drink 'Dry Cider'!)🍻🍻🍻🍻

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday!-----Lets hope its a 'good'in'!?

THE TOON 3 WOLVERHAMPTON WANABEEZ 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

Posted just after 'high noon bells'🔔 Thorzday 16th January 2025

"119 YEARS OF HURT BANISHED TO THE BIN!"

NUFC were gannin for wor 9th win in a row in aall compititions to equal the club record and Alexander the Great (Alexander Isak) woz gannin for A club record of scornin' in hiz 8th succesive game!---On top of that---and amazingly, we hadnt done the double ower Wolves since the 1905-1906 season!----119 years ago!

And aall of the above woz achieved in 90 minutes (plus 10) at SJP last neet in wor 3-0 victory, which sends us to 4th place in the Premyaa Leegue table and just 9 points behind leaders Livaapoool! (Iz the impossible dream on?)

The Toon were well on top from the kick off and eventually took the lead in the 34th minute at The Leazes End with (guess who?) scorin a wicked deflected shot off a Wolves defender, to break Alan Shearer and Joe Willock's 7 goal record of scorin in 8 succesive games to claim a club record in The Premyaa Leegue era!

Just to make sure that this didnt register az an own goal, he scored again in the 57th minute at The Gallowgate End when Jacob Murphy foond Bruno just ootside the box and he expertly slid the baall to Isak who stabbed the baall into the net from near the penalty spot to double wor lead! 

The Wanabeez had their chances but the nearest they came woz to shave the post and shoot narrowly wide, when they should of scored!---One reason why they now find themselz in a relegation place!

To make absolutly shure of the 3 points and victory, Anthony Gordon scored from a Isak assist inside the box and after a very lenghty VAR check for offside, the goal woz given to put the final nail in Wolves coffin!

The Wanabeez then had a goal chalked off for hand baall when a VAR check ruled it oot, after another lang wait!---And then near the end Martin Dubravka made a stupendous save, deflectin' the baall off the bar to keep a clean sheet!---It just wasnt Wolves day az they dropped into the 3rd relegation place on goal difference!

The win meenz we equal the club record of 9 consecutive wins in aall compititions acheived in 1994 and 2016

The next record attempt comes on Saturday in the '12:30 bells' graveyard slot, when we take on Bournemoooth at SJP, lookin for wor 10th win in a row to BREAK the above record!

It wont be eazy of course az Bournemoooth are nee mugs who we havvint beaten in the last 5 attempts AND are on a 10 game unbeaten run az well!—-So sommik must give!

Attendance: 51,975 (Just 1,300 very quiet Wolves fans)

*

THE TOON V WOLVERHAMPTON WANABEEZ *** TOONEET!

 Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ Wedinzday 15th January 2025

THE ‘NEW’CASTLE (BUILT IN 1080) WITH THE NUFC FLAG FLYIN’ HIGH!

We gan into this Premyaa Leegue game at ‘7:30 🔔s’ lookin’ for wor 9th win in a row against a struggling’ Wolves 🐺 side, just ootside the relegation zone! IF? we dee it, it would equal the club record set in 1994 and equaled in 2016!

(The game iz live on TNT 🧨)

Alexander Isak iz lookin’ to score in hiz 8th successive Premyaa Leegue game, which would BE a club record!

A win would us lift us to 4th place az 6 of the teams aroond us dropped 2 points each last neet, az they aall drew with each other! (if Inglish teams dee well in Europe this season, 5th could be enough to claim an extra Champions Leegue place next season!)

Records are there to be broken!—-It’s aall to play for!

And then on Saturday at the graveyard 🪦 time of ‘12:30 bells’ we take on Bournemoooth, again at SJP, for wor 3rd home game in 6 days! (We hear that Bournemoooth have hardly sold any tickets coz of the KO time!)

A Geordie Times match report on the Wolves 🐺 game will appear here sometime on Thorzday!

Az per usual “Watch this space!”

THE TOON 3. THE BROMLEEE RAVENS 🐦‍⬛ 1 *** FA CUP 3rd ROOND

 Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Munday 13th January 2025

“MARTIN DUBRAVKA-WE WANT YOU TO STAY!”

Bromleee’z nickname iz The Ravens, a close relative to The Magpies, but they’re a million miles apart in futbaall terms!

Steady Eddie made 9 changes to the startin line up at The Arse last Tuezday

To be fair they gave us an orly fright, when, after sustained pressure from The Toon who were attacking the Gallowgate goal, they broke away in the 8th minute az Cameron Congreve raced away and hit a great shot passed Dubravka in wor goal to huge roars from the 3,000 Ravens who had travelled up from ‘sarf Landan’! 1-0 to them

And then unbelievableee they nearly made it 2-0 with a shot across the box which just went past the far post! (Panic stations!)

The lead didn’t last lang however, (thankfully) when Matt Targett passed to Lewis Miley and he hit an unstoppable shot from the edge of the box and beyond the Bromleee keeper, to level the scores after 16 minutes at The Gallowgate End! 1-1

We tried in vain to take the lead and they held oot despite a seige on their goal! HT 1-1

We attacked the Leazes goal in the 2nd period and within 5 minutes we had a chance to take the lead when Matt Targett woz brought doon in the box and the ref pointed straight to the spot, despite protests from Bromleee players! (Nee VAR til the 5th roond?)👇

Anthony Gordon took the penalty and stroked the baall confidently into the back of the net to finally take the lead! 2-1 to us!👇

The baall from this point woz virtually in their half az they buckled under the pressure!— And sure enough, bang on the hour mark Osalu hit a fabulous left footed shot into the far corner of the net to the relief of the home crowd and to put the game to bed! 🛌 

There woz nee way back for the galent Leegue 2 side (who were non leegue last season!) and we ran oot 3-1 winners!—-This woz wor 8th win in a row!—The draw for the 4th roond after the game paired us with 3rd tier Bormingham City at St Andrews next month! ty

Durin’ the 2nd half Toon fans started singin’ to wor goalie: “Martin Dubravka we want you to stay!”, which he emotionally acknowledged! (this followed speculation that he woz to sign for a Saudi club!)

Amazingleee this woz the 13th (THIRTEENTH) time this season that we have faced a London club in Leegue and cup’s so far! (with a minimum of 7 more before the end of the season!)

Attendance: 52,088 (Slighty more than the 15,000 who attended the mackems game on Saturday!)

And 40 years ago it woz nee 👆different!

Footnote:

The local rag the Chronical  sorry! the ‘Wrongical’ said Botman had a decent game 

—-and he wasn’t even playin’!???🤔

Some player, that Sven Botman!

THE TOON V BROMLEEE*** FA CUP 3rd ROOND THIS AFTERNOOON!

 Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ Sunday12th January 2025

The forst ever meetin’ between The Toon and Bromley takes place this afternooon and it’s Leegue 2 Bromley’s biggest game in their entire 133 year history, az they have never played a top fight team before  in a competitive game—AND it’s their forst ever time in the 3rd roond of the FA Cup!

Their average gate iz 3,000 and they will bring at least that many to SJP this afternooon from ‘sarf Landan’, where a selloot 52,000 plus crowd will watch on!

Thats in total contrast to FA Cup games played from Thorzday onwards, where Sheff U for example, got a pathetic 6,000 ‘crowd’ v Cardiff, with stands shut doon, includin' their 'Kop'? (And just 150 from Cardiff!)

There are connections between NUFC and Bromley, az ex Toon goalkeepin' coach Andy Woodman, just happens to be their manager!

Amazingly Bromley will be the NINTH different London club we have faced so far this season! (And the 3rd in a row in 8 days!--Sporz, The Arse and 'them'!)

'Steady Eddie' confirms that 'Alexander the Great' (Isak) will be rested for the game, az will Martin Dubravka in goal, az we try and persuade him to stay for the rest of the season, az he haz done a great job coverin' for injured Nick 'The Pope'!  Dubravka haz conceded just 2 goals in the last 7 games---which of course we have won!

'Fab' Schar and Bruno will be available to play after missin The Arse game through suspension!---Emil Krafth iz aalso expected to take part at some point!

The draw for the 4th roond takes place aroond aboot '5:15 bells'🔔? on Sunday (BBC 1)----Lets hope we are in it!?---We take nothin' for granted! (Remember the 1-0 defeat by Leegue 2 Cambridge 3 years ago at SJP?)

THE LAST TIME NUFC BEAT THEM AT THEIR PLACE!

 Posted ‘high noon 🛎️bells’ Saturday 11th January 2025

TOON FANS CELEBRATE WOR FAMOUS 2-0 WIN AT THE ARSE ORLIER THIS WEEK!

🤪👍🏁

The last time we won away at these current Premyaa Leegue groonds iz az follows! 

Wor famous win at The Emirates v The Arse orlier this week iz top of the list!

Az yoo can see we have won at 15 away groonds this decade and 18 in total this century! 

Livaapoool iz bottom of the list and iz the anly current Premyaa Leegue groond that we havvint won at in the 21st century!  It’s now 30 years since we last won at Anfield!

The Arse 2025

Sporz 2025

Ipswich 2024

Moan U 2024

Forest 2024

Villa 2024

Fulhim 2024

Wolves 2024

Brentfaad 2024

Evaatin 2023

West Ham 2023

Sooothampton 2023

Lestaa 2022

Palace 2020

Bournemoooth 2020

Brightin 2017

Man City 2014

Chelseee 2012

Livaapoool 1995

THE NUFC MAGICAL MYSTERY PUB CRAWL TOUR 2024-2025

 Posted periodically (az we tick the away groonds off, on wor travels), from 4th August 2024 to 7th January 2025

the remarkable hare, matlock, for an under 21s game v derby under 21s (see boozer number 011)

The NUFC away pub crawl tour 2024-2025 iz underway and so far we have visited 47 different drinkin dens at 17 away games! (13 forst team games and 4 U21s games) 

Some pubs we have visited numerous times, so first visits of the season only listed (*Numerous visits*)

Premyaa Leegue games, unless stated.

001 tams bar, south shields (south shields v nufc u21s)

002 1st cloud arena chilled beer bar (south shields v nufc u21s)

003 friend at hand, london (bmouth game) *

004 marquis of cornwall, london (bmouth game) *

005 lord john russell, london (bmouth game) *

006 norfolk arms, london (bmouth game)*

007 brewhouse and kitchen, pokesdown (bmouth game)

008 the way outback, pokesdown (bmouth game)

009 waterloo tap, london (bmouth game)

010 vat and fiddle, nottingham (forest, leegue cup game) (aalso for the premyaa leegue game)

011 the remarkable hare, matlock (derby u21s v nufc u21s game)

012 matlock sports and social club, matlock (derby u21s v nufc u21s game)

013 the picturehouse, stafford (wolves game)

014 the yard, stafford (wolves game)

015 the sun, stafford (wolves game)

016 east putney tavern, london (fulham game)

017 spotted horse, london (fulham game)

018 the vault (below putney pies), london (fulham game)

019 craft beer co., london (fulham game)

020 the mill bar and kitchen, manchester (everton game)

021 the barlow arms, liverpool (everton game)

022 the north western, liverpool (everton game)

023 mable tavern, london (chelsea game)

024 aragon house, london (chelsea)

025 president hotel bar, london (chelsea)

026 betjeman arms, london (chelsea game)*

027 the bole bridge, tamworth (u21s v tamworth)

028 tamworth clubhouse, tamworth (u21s v tamworth)

029 the ram, newark (forest leegue game)

030 industry, nottingham (forest leegue game)

031 jb, newark (forest leegue game)

032: the grafton, bedford (palace game)

033: the craft beer cabin, london (palace game)

034: the spirit of endevour, boston (u21s v boston united)

035: ellenders, boston (u21s v boston united)

036: the botanist, london (brentford game)

037: the express tavern, london ( brentford game)

038: isaacs, ipswich (ipswich game)👆👇

039: the briarbank, ipswich (ipswich game)

040: gasworks, manchester (man u game)

041: peveril of the peak, manchester (man u game)

042: the britons protection, manchester (man u game)

043: the waterhouse, manchester (man u game)

044: heaton park, manchester (man u game)

045: the volunteer, london (spurs game)

046: redemption, london (spurs game)

047: the swimmers at the grafton arms (arse league cup game) 👆👇