THE TOON V THE FRIAR TUCK MOB *** TOMORROW AFTERNOOON!

 Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Saturday  4th Octobaa 2025

“FOREST ARE AWAY TO NEWCASTLE TOMORROW ROBIN AND I’M TRAVELLING UP ON THE 7:30 STAGE COACH FROM SHERWOOD FOREST!”

LAST ONE BEFORE ANOTHER BREAK!

We gan into tomorrow’s game with 6 points from 6 games, against a Forest 🌳 team who have yet to win this season under new coach Ange Pistazanewtalou (or whatever he’s caalled?) who haz made the worst start for a Forest manager in their entire history (and long may it continue!)  So bad that their fans are calling for him to be “sacked in the mornin!” after just 3 weeks in charge!

Yohan Wissa’s knee injury iz worse than woz feared and he iz now not expected to play until at least mid November!— Then he will be off to The African Nations Cup in Decembaa and the very real possibility of him not playin for us til late January!—Unreal for a £55 million poond striker who haz yet to kick a baall for us, or even train!!!

Jacob Ramsey iz expected to be at least on the bench, while Tino Livramento will be oot for a while after bein stretchered off v The Arse last Sunday!

We really dee need to pick up 3 points tomorrow to climb up the Premyaa Leegue table!

PS: I’m busy working on the match report for wor U19s v USG U19s in Brussels, played before wor Champions Leegue game last Wedinzday!

It will be published sometime durin next week, when aa get time to dee it!  

A match report on the Forest game will appear here on Munday!

Az per usual: “Watch this space!”

GROUND 143 REVISITED *** USG 0. THE TOON 4 *** CHAMPIONS LEEGUE GROUP STAGE MATCH TWO

 Posted from ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Thorzday 2nd Octobaa 2025 on a train somewhere in Belgium! (So, sorry 4 eny misstayks on the bumpy trayn 🚂 ride!)---Updated Friday 'high noon bells' (onwards!)

Ground number 143 revisited (1st visited 1990s v Anderlecht, friendly)

Date of this visit: 1st October 2025 (121st competitive European game in a row 1977-2025)

Lotto Park (formerly Stade Constant Vandenstock), Brussels , Belgium

Royal Union Saint-Gilloise 0

Newcastle United 4 (Waltemade, Gordon (2 pens), Barnes

UEFA Champions League group stage game 2

Attendance: 16,038 (1,000 plus Toon fans) (plus 5 who sneaked in!)

“BEER WE GO!” 🍻 🍻 

This woz undoubtedly wor best away European performance since we beat Royal Antwerp 5-0 in the 1990s in the UEFA Cup!  Aalso in Belgium!

The game woz played at Anderlecht’s Lotto Stadium az Union’s groond isn’t fit for purpose to stage big European games!

The goal sequences were az follows:

17th minute: Waltemade latches onto Tonali’s shot to deflected the baall past the Union keeper in front of The Toon Travellers! 1-0 to us!

VIEW FROM THE FRONT ROW, TOP DECK!---WE COULD'NT FIND WOR SEATS AZ SOME TOON FANS HAD RIPPED THE SEAT NUMBERS OFF!

Belgian booze woz allowed into the seated area and I got a beer shampoo when somebody hoyed it when we scored!

43rd minute: Elanga iz brought doon on the edge of the box and the rep points to the spot!  Up steps Anthony Gordon to send the keeper the wrang way to double wor lead! (More beer shampoo!) HT 2-0 to us!

OPTICAL ILLUSION?---THE STADIUM LOOKS MUCH BIGGER THAN THE 21,000 CAPACITY!---WITH 6,000 EMPTY SEATS THEY COULD EASILY HAVE GIVEN WOR FANS MORE TICKETS, THAN THE MEAGRE 1,000!----SOME CORPERATES DIDN'T TURN UP AND FANS BACK IN THE UK WERE CONTACTED ON THE DAY OF THE MATCH, TO SAY THEY COULD NOW GET TICKETS!

64 th minute: Another penalty at the far end from us, this time for hand baall! Gordon steps up again and sends the baall to the right of their keeper, who dives the reet way this time, but the shot iz too powerful az it hits the back of the net! 3-0 to us!

Yet more beer shampoo ower mee heed!

80th minute: Sub Harvey Barnes completes the rout when he iz put through and hits a sweet shot to complete the rout!

For the 4th time in the match, we got well and truly ‘shampood’!— This meeenz I won’t need to wash mee golden locks in the shower back at the hotel and save a tenner in the process! 

The win catapults NUFC up from 26th in the Champions Leegue table to 11th, which iz good enough for a play off place!⬇️

Attendance: 16,038 (Just ower 1,000 Toon fans!)(At least five sneaked in, sayin they were'corperate' and they just let them through withoot checkin if they had tickets!)

I’m on that photo somewhere?  

If yoo know — yoo know!

“THE END GAME!”

Benfica and Athletic Bilbao at SJP next in matches 3 and 4!  So we actually have a great chance to qualify for the knockoot stage, withoot the play offs!?

This brief report woz written on a train in Belgium and will be fully updated sometime on Friday when we get back! ((Includin bar crawl photos!)

A match report on wor U19s 2-0 defeat at USGs Joseph Marien Stadium, played in the afternoon before the main game, will appear sometime ower the weekend!

Az per usual “Watch this space intentleee!” ⬇️

Updated Friday ‘high 🕛 🔔s

Drinkin den report!  

In total 12 different drinkin dens were visited on this trip to Belgium, via France, startin and endin at The Barrel Vaults near King’s Cross station! 

FORST AND LAST PORT O CALL IN LONDON

THE MENIN GATE WAR MEMORIAL AT YPES, BELGIUM AND THE UPRA INN ON THE LEFT

CAN YOO SPOT THE FORMER NUFC NUMBER 9? 

LE PAM PAM, YPES, BELGIUM

PARK CAFE, ANDELECHT, BRUSSELS, BELGIUM

I'VE GOT NEE IDEA WHERE THIS BAR WOZ? ---JUST REMEMBED--ITS IN ANDERLECHT!

UNION TAVERNE, FOREST, BRUSSELS (BEFORE U19s GAME)

EVEN THE TOOL SHED BOG SEAT HAZ A UNION STICKER ON IT!

JOSEPH MARIEN STADIUM COVERED IN SCAFFOLDING NEXT TO UNION'S TAVERNE

STADIUM VIEW FROM PETA CORNER, FOREST, BRUSSELS

PETA CORNER, UNION SG PIX

PETA CORNER, FOREST, BRUSSELS, BELGIUM

THIS MUST BE A MILLION TO ONE CHANCE!---SVEN-GORAN ERIKSSON, THE OWNER OF THE DEN BRAS BAR, IN THE SMAALL TOWN OF KORTRIJK (WHERE WE WERE BASED FOR 2 NEETS NEAR BRUSSELS) SHOWS US A FRAMED PHOTO OF SJP!!!

CAN YOO SPOT THE SJP PHOTO ON THE WAALL?🠉

DEN BRAS, KORTRIJK, BELGIUM

CAFE CASSIMIR, KORTRIJK⬆️⬇️

A VERY SPOOKY PLACE THAT PLAYED HEAVY METAL MUSIC!

GAINSBAR, KORTRIJK, BELGIUM

LE PARVIS DE TREILLE, LILLE, FRANCE

LE CHOPP'ING, LILLE, FRANCE

*MAD-SAD TOURIST PHOTOS TO FOLLOW!⬇️

KORTRIJK CATHEDRAL

YPRES

MENIN GATE, YPRES

MENIN GATE

MENIN GATE MEMORIAL

MARKET PLACE, YPRES

*

YOU NEED A MASTERS DEGREE TO BUY TICKETS THESE DAYS!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Tuezday 30th Septembaa 2025 (On the train to King’s Cross)

UNION SGs JOSEPH MARIEN STADIUM WHERE WOR U19s PLAY IN THE ORLY KICK OFF ***NEW GROOND! *** NEW GROOND!

NUFC play Union SG in Brussels tomorrow neet in The Champions Leegue —and az we type we are on the train 🚂 to King’s Cross (London) and then onwards ‘next door’ to St. Pancras to catch the Eurostar 🚆 train to Lille in France! We are stopping in a place caalled Kortrijk which iz near Lille , and just ower the border inside Belgium and aboot an hours train ride from Brussels (much cheaper than Brussels hotels and Brussels iz a shithole anyway!)

‘The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’ are takin in TWO games on Wedinzday—-Forstly to Union’s Joseph Marien Stadium to watch NUFC U19s take on Union U19s in the UEFA Youth Leegue and then onward 4 miles on the tram to Anderlecht FCs Lotto Park where the main event of the day takes place in The Champions Leegue Group stage! (Kick off times are just ower 5 hours apart!) ‘12.30 bells 🔔’ GMT (Geordie Meen Time!)  time and ‘5.45 bells’ 🔔 GMT,  (Belgium iz an hour aheed of us!)

BEEN HERE BEFORE ⬆️ TO WATCH ANDERLECHT V NUFC (1990s)

The reason that Union can’t host Champions Leegue games iz because their 9,400 capacity stadium isn’t deemed suitable!—Hence the switch to Brussels city rivals Anderlecht!

However!— there are nee issues aboot using their own stadium for lesser games, which iz great news for The Toonhoppers who have (somehow!) managed to get tickets for this U19s game!

Honestly, yi’d Fink it would be easy to get tickets for games like this, but it’s a minefield to negotiate Union’s website and purchase one!

1: You need to create an account!

2: You need a 10 figure password includin numbers, letters, and asterisks!

3 You need to photograph your passport with it in front of you IF you can find the Onfido option to verify that it’s YOU! (photos of your passport are NOT good enough!)

4 Then you need to download it to your wallet IF it will let you?

(I had to get help from somebody who iz clued up on these things— (Steev) and even he struggled to negotiate the hurdles to get a ticket!

BUT he did manage after 20 minutes tryin, to get my ticket onto my telling bone ➡️📱! (Horray!)

Cannot imagine that there will be many Toonhoppers at THAT game!

Honestly! it would be easier to buy a ticket for The Champions Leegue final than for this U19s game!

(Why do they make it so fcukin hard to buy a ticket for a minor game?)

To try and buy a ticket for the U19s game, gan to:

Ticketing@rusg.be

Best of luck!----Yi'll need it!

THE TOON 1. THE ARSE 2. *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2025-2026

 Posted ‘1.16pm 🛎️ bells’ Munday 29th Septembaa 2025

“NATURAL ⬆️ POSITION NONSENCE!”

Yet another stoppage time defeat for NUFC in the most agonising way against a cartel club!

Last time it woz a 10th minute stoppage time defeat v Livaapoool—and this time it’s a 7th minute stoppage time defeat by The Arse!

VAR has got a lot of answering to dee!  Nick Woltemade woz punched in the face in the forst half by Gabriel and (of course!) HE scored the arseholes winner deep into stoppage time, when he should have been red carded! 🟥 But (of course!) the ref and VAR completely missed it! ⬇️

And then in the 2nd half, VAR said that Gabriel's arm woz in a natural position when he handled the baall in the box, az he blocked Anthony Elanga's cross!  Az yoo can see by the top photo, it’s a stone wall penalty!  This happened just before the 8 minutes 2nd half extra time woz added, due to long treatment to Tino Livramento, who woz stretchered off in the 60th minute whith wot looked like a very bad injury! (Fingers crossed 🤞 that it izzint too bad!)

In the forst half a penalty woz awarded to The Arse when The Pope and Gyokerez collided in the penalty area!

Not anly a penalty, but wor goalie possibly gettin red carded az well! (again!)

VAR told the ref to look at the monitor and after a very lang look, he overturned hiz decision, sayin that Pope had got the baall forst, before the man! —-Relief!

The breakthrough had came in the 35th minute when Sandro Tonali crossed for Nick Waltemade to send a powerful heeder past Raya in the Arseholes goal at The Leazes End! ---This woz wor forst on target by the way!

1-0 to us!

Chances for Joelinton and Jacob Murphy in the 2nd half didnt come to fruitition <(we naa aall the big words!) and we paid the price az wor visitors pressed for an equaliser at The Leazes End!

After heroics by The Pope who saved many great shots, the Arse finally equalised in the 82nd minute when Toon ‘old boy’ Mikel Merino heeded the baall into the corner of the net from a set piece corner by Rice! 1-1   And then the Toon penalty incident! (see above!)

8 minutes of stoppage time woz added az The Arse pressed for a winner and it finally came in the 2nd last minute of added time when The Pope somehow missed the baall from a corner, az he did an 'air punch' and Gabriel (who shud have been sent off of course!) woz at hand to force the baall ower the line to break wor hearts again! 💔

The defeat leaves NUFC in 15th place with just one win in six Premyaa Leegue games!

Attendance: 52,199 (3,000 arrogant Arseholes az usual!)

Union SG are next up in Brussels in The Champions Leegue on Wedinzday----Its “aall go” az they say!